I’ve been walking around Shanghai a lot lately (Have you seen me?), and I’ve come to the conclusion that I am kind of a big deal. Whenever I go out to the market or a fruit stand, the local people tell me I look like Da Shan, especially when I wear my glasses. For those of you who don’t know, Da Shan is China’s other professional white guy who looks nothing like me.
Basically, Da Shan is big in China for being white and speaking Mandarin well. We made it on a bunch of Chinese TV programs back in the ‘90’s and hasn’t looked back. He’s done endorsement deals, made a bunch of money, and been Canadia’s Good-Will Ambassador type for the last 10 years.
Now, could you imagine the opposite version of Da Shan? To set the scene, you are in a TV studio, and an Asian man steps up to the microphone. In a deep, radio announcer voice, he says “Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, my name is Leonard and I am here to tell you about stuff.” :::makes lightsaber noises::. Everyone would burst into applause, complement him on his amazing ability to speak English, and then throw money.
I don’t know exactly why, but that’s racist.